


12 years comes and goes, and you went

by asphyxiatinghypnotic



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, M/M, idk - Freeform, my bitchass hasn't updated this story since march and im sorry, no motivation, thanks for waiting, this has a full on plan but i might orphan it, we'll see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-03-26 05:16:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13850871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asphyxiatinghypnotic/pseuds/asphyxiatinghypnotic
Summary: we all lose something we can't replace.





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is a story I started writing awhile back. It's been edited a few times and read over. Maybe it's better than the original, it might not be. All I can ask is that you bear with me and this story, because hopefully I'll improve over chapters. All I ask is that you just enjoy this as much as you can.

Taako always enjoyed car radios. 

There had always been so many in his life, he grew immune to turning them up loudly and Lup screaming the lyrics to songs she knew at the top of her lungs. That was twelve years ago though, and Taako hasn’t seen Lup for twelve years. She just kinda upped and left one day, no traces whatsoever. She left her boyfriend, Barry, heartbroken. She left Taako that day too, her own brother. He was lost and afraid, but he stayed for a few days. Weeks at most, before he left too. It was only a matter of time before he left though and everyone knew that, but no one remembers anybody or anything now. Lucretia and Davenport seemed to be the only two to keep in touch, they talked on a daily basis, but it was small talk. 

Taako met - well re-met - Magnus Burnsides in a Walmart parking lot. It was business as usual, Taako scrolling through his phone, and not paying attention to where he’s going when a cart crashes into his stomach. Taako wheezes and couldn’t breathe for a moment. He’s irritated before Magnus can even get his string of apologies out. 

“Woah, woah there. What the hell!” Taako shouts, and tosses his hands up. Magnus apologizes again. 

“Watch where you’re going next time,” Taako huffs out before continuing his walk to his car. 

It’s a month later when it clicks with him who that was. He grabs his phone off the coffee table pausing the show he’s watching and scrolling through his contacts. When he sees Magnus Burnsides he slams his thumb down on the call button. It rings a few rings, but thankfully, he answers. 

“Hello?” Magnus’s voice is filled with utter confusion. When his phone started ringing he knew the face from the contact picture somewhere, he just couldn’t place it. 

“What up homie, it’s the person you hit with your cart,” Taako hears Magnus take a breath in. Taako should say he’s not on the phone with him to berate him for the cart incident, but it’s funnier listening to Magnus struggle for words.

“Man, if you found my number to harass me, I’m sorry and I don’t know how many times I have to tell you-” Magnus rambles, and Taako can’t stand to let this man suffer anymore.

“Magnus, my man, it’s fine,” Taako has to practically shout over how loud Magnus is. Magnus abruptly stops his sentence.

“How do you know my name?” Magnus asks. Taako has him on speaker, scrolling through his contact and old messages. 

“To be honest, I’m not quite sure. Your contact notes said ‘homeboy’ though, so I guess we were friends. Our messages are pretty weird too. Seems we were close,” there’s a pain in Taako’s voice on the last sentence. One he only has when he talks about his past. A past he barely remembered.

“Really? I mean your contact looked familiar and your name seemed familiar, but I remember nothing about you,” Magnus says, his voice is mixed with something. Taako felt a pain of something he hadn’t felt in awhile. The pain of being forgotten. Taako brushes off the feeling, tosses it into the trash bag with all of his other feelings. The prolonged feeling of wanting to scream never really disappears though, even after Taako hangs up on Magnus a few hours later. 

There’s an odd feeling bubbling in Taako’s stomach reconnecting with Magnus. He feels lonely, and maybe he’s always felt like this, but he’s always tossed feelings in the garbage. He shakes the feeling off and begins to make himself dinner. It’s not a big all out meal like he would make if others were over, he hadn’t made one of those in so long. So he makes a tiny chicken for himself, and that’s all he needs. He watches trashy television to distract his mind, and reruns of Teen Mom are sufficing.

There’s a cold silence in the house when he goes to bed. He tosses and turns in the bed. It feels to empty, like someone belongs there with him. He huffs angrily and flips over to look at the ceiling. He’s cold. He tries to sleep, closing his eyes and tries to let sleep succumb him.

He couldn’t sleep. He thinks, and remembers his friends. He remembers good times with Lup before she disappeared. He remembers how he and Lup were on the road. He remembers how they trudged through the streets in hot summers and how they froze in cold winters. He remembers Merle and his optimism for the future. How even after his divorce with his wife he talked up the future of his children. Yes, he did talk about how dead beat of a dad he was, and god did he need to shut up about that. He was good as a dad, even if he didn’t think so. He remembers Lucretia, who was shy and quiet. Who never spoke up and never liked being put in the spotlight. They weren’t compatible. Taako was loud and obnoxious, while Lucretia like to shut herself in her room. When they did talk though, it meant something. They spent few nights at a diner when Taako didn’t feel great and just talked. He thinks about tiny old Davenport who’s so dedicated to everything he did that he made adventurous stories, leaving out the bad parts. Taako thinks about how they would all gather around on the floor, like small children, when Davenport began to tell stories. Davenport would sit on the couch, having it all to himself, while telling grand tales about his adventures. Barry, his sister’s boyfriend, who would mistake one twin for the other. Barry, who Taako lovingly nicknamed Barold, loved his sister deeply that he as wounded deeply too when she left. He never forgot about Barry, but hates the fact Barry has been off the grid for years now. Taako doesn’t know when he begins to cry, he doesn’t remember putting his coat on and sitting on his apartment stairs. He ends up on the phone with Magnus again, though.

“Taako? It’s two am,” Magnus says, his voice is gruff with sleep. Taako takes in a shuddering breath and lets out a watery laugh. 

“Sorry,” his voice is wavering. He hears Magnus yawn.

“What’s up?” Magnus asks. 

“Well you know, I got to thinking. I thought about our friends and who I used to be. I thought about my sister. You know, Maggie, I miss my sister,” Taako let’s out a choked sob, mixed with a chuckle. He hears Magnus make a mangled noise. It seems to be concerned, and he also seems like he’s going to say something. The words get lost in his throat though, mixed with his tongue and his several thoughts racing his mind. 

“Taako, are you okay?” Magnus asks. Taako shrugs, he knows Magnus can’t see him, but that doesn’t stop him.

“Why do you ask my man?” Taako’s voice quivers. He hears Magnus shift around on the other line. 

“Because, Taako, you don’t… you don’t sound alright,” Magnus sounds more alert, more alive, and more awake. Taako grins to himself, still crying.

“You don’t need to worry about me, Maggie,” there’s a chuckle in his voice. Taako rubs his face again, and gets up to go back into his apartment. 

“Taako, is it okay if I come over tomorrow?” Magnus questions. For a moment, Taako can’t breath. 

“I-mean-uh, yeah. Yeah. I guess,” Taako’s words stumble out of his mouth. He feels the foreign concept of letting someone in his house again, and he feels intensely panicked. It’ll be nice for him to have someone over though. He truly wants to believe it will be good for him, but now-a-days Taako doesn’t know what’s good for him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then, text me your address. Goodnight, Taako,” Magnus says. 

“Goodnight, Magnus,” Taako says.

He still doesn’t sleep.


	2. two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taako at Magnus meet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to reread this to make the chapter summary, I actually only read the first two paragraphs and glanced over the rest of it. I hope you enjoy this, because I don't remember anything of it!

Taako has somehow survived a full day without sleep. Well, so far. Magnus is supposed to be his apartment around one, so maybe he can sneak a nap in. Saturday is off to a fantastic start.

When he wakes up to knocking on his door. Taako jerks awake and sluggishly gets off the couch, all his joints popping. He lets out a sigh of satisfaction before popping his fingers and yawning. Taako takes a minute to compose himself before answering the door. 

And there stands Magnus Burnsides towering over his doorstep, filling up the door with his immures height. Taako is taken aback at how tall he is. He literally has to duck to get inside Taako’s apartment. 

Taako wants to run. His legs feel like jelly and his arms feel like lead. He feels heavy all of a sudden, and he really wants to be somewhere other than here. In front of the door where Magnus, who he hasn’t properly seen in years, stands. He’s never been good with anything like this. True reunions, of the sort. His knees feel wobbly and he feels sick all of a sudden

He let’s Magnus in, though. He moves out of Magnus’ way, reluctantly at best, so Magnus can get in. He doesn’t know why he does it when he can very much tell Magus to go away right then and there, but he doesn’t. He lets him step through his door.

Magnus Burnsides is absolutely beaming. He’s excited to sit down and talk with an old friend, to begin catching up on so many missed years. But Taako is terrified. He feels his throat close up and it feels like there is a bear clawing at his chest. 

“Take a seat, anywhere,” Taako gets out. Magnus stands in the doorway for a moment before taking a seat on the black loveseat Taako owns. It’s quiet for a moment, and Taako goes to sit down on the old worn black couch he own. Suddenly, the holes in the couch are the most interesting thing in the world. Magnus doesn’t seem to notice this. 

“It’s so good to see you again! No, it’s more than good! It’s fantastic!” Magnus is nearly shouting and Taako has to quiet him down. Taako gives him an unsteady smile. 

“You too, Mags,” his voice is quiet. It’s steadier than he expected it to be, but he wants to bolt. He can’t just get close to someone again. Everyone he’s gotten close to, specifically Lup, has disappeared or he’s left them. His mind is like a music box of thoughts he can’t seem quit winding. He thinks about about getting up to make him and Magnus lunch to ease himself, but that only brings back more memories, so he stays rooted in his spot.

“God, how have you been?” Magnus is ecstatic to be talking to Taako, and don’t get Taako wrong, he’s ecstatic to see Magnus too. Taako begins to pick at the blood red nail polish on his nails, a habit he picked up years ago. Taako wants to cry and vomit all at the same time, he just can’t push himself off the couch. 

“I-I’ve been good,” Taako stutters. He curses himself, but smiles at Magnus. He’s putting up a facade so the only other person in the room can’t see him lying. They’re supposed to be brothers, they’re supposed to be close, but he can’t bring himself to stop lying. That is, until he breaks. He can’t compose himself and suddenly he’s crying, and Magnus is trying to comfort him, and it is all too much. Taako stands up and takes a deep breath. Magnus is left on the couch, a little shocked about how Taako has just started bawling.

“Taako, what’s up?” Magnus’ voice is soft. It only makes Taako cry again, right after he composed himself. He turns to Magnus and shrugs.

“I wish I knew Mags, I wish I knew,” Taako lets out a jerky laugh, it’s a laugh filled with tears and he hates how vulnerable he sounds. Magnus lets out a sigh. Taako feels an itching in his stomach, there’s something crawling up his throat.

“Taako, are you okay?” Magnus asks. Taako wipes his eyes and shrugs. 

“You know it,” Taako laughs, trying to cover up the insecurity that’s surrounding him, beginning to engulf him. He feels vulnerable, and his walls he kept up are crumbling under Magnus’ stare, but he plans on keeping some of his dignity. So he says it. 

“You want anything to eat?” Taako has cooked, for himself though, and he’s scared that if he cooks for Magnus, he’ll hurt him. It’ll help though. It has to help.

“Um...no, I ate before I came,” Magnus says, fiddling with his hands. Taako makes a noise and shrugs, walking to the kitchen to make himself food. It brings more anxiety cooking with someone in the room than it should relieve. They sit in silence while Taako makes himself lunch. He finds the silence more peaceful than he should. 

Magnus is sitting in front of Taako in Taako’s kitchen. It’s a foreign feeling to Taako, having someone sitting in front him. The dining table isn’t filled usually, it’s strange. It’s not new to Magnus, though. He’s so used to having someone in front of him. When Julia passed it all became new, sitting alone at a dining table. Sitting in front of Taako, someone he hasn’t seen in years, it’s refreshing

That’s when they talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> find me on tumblr @http-voltroncoalition


	3. three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter from Magnus's point of view

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is shorter than the first two AND the last prewritten, so I have absolutely no clue when the fourth chapter will come out.

Magnus Burnsides had a heart way too big for his body.

It made him happy though. He brought people joy, and that brought him joy. There wasn’t a way you could walk all over Magnus though. Maybe that’s why Julia had found him so intriguing. They became instant friends as soon as Magnus stepped into her father’s shop. Though he did tread on water for the first few weeks, but as weeks grew into months and months and months grew into years, they knew Magnus wouldn’t be leaving for a long time.

They got married in Julia’s small town and they had a family. Magnus felt good, he had a good steady family, he could feel like he had something. He was supposed to leave town for a week to visit Merle, a good friend of his.

Then Julia got sick.

Magnus rushed back to his home, where Julia was. The only thing on his mind was to get home and see Julia. He couldn't lose Julia. He’d lose his everything.

He lost his everything four weeks late.

He left Raven’s Roost right after Julia’s funeral. He couldn’t stay in the that was suffocating him, he needed to breathe. Days were difficult after Julia’s passing. He could still smell her shampoo after a shower, the way she laughed, her voice. He remember her.

And it hurt.

He stayed with Merle for two years before getting back on his feet. Then he ran into Taako -quite literally- at Walmart. He’d much better rather be at Kroger than Walmart, but Walmart was the closest store at the moment. 

That lands Magnus where he is now. In front of Taako, in his apartment, at his dining table. They were talking, after years. It felt good. Maybe not for Taako, but for Magnus.

“Do you remember Merle?” Magnus asks raising an eyebrow. Taako nods his head yes. Magnus gives a warm smile. 

“I have his number. We can all meet up sometime, if you’d like that,” Magnus suggests. Taako freezes, only for a moment before inhaling. He takes a bite of the turkey sandwich he made.

“That’d be cool,” Taako shrugs. Magnus can’t his face, it’s just blank. Taako just kind of...exists.

“Now that Merle is out of the way, let’s catch up old pal,” Magnus beams. Taako gives him a tight smile. 

“How’ve you been?” Taako asks before taking another bite of his turkey sandwich.

“I’ve been alright,” Magnus says. He should tell him about Julia. “I got married.”

“What?! Who’s the lucky gal? Or guy. I don’t judge,” Taako shrugs, but at least he’s smiling now. It makes Magnus feel slightly successful. 

“Her name was Julia,” Magnus smiles fondly as a memory of the two resurfaces.

“Was? Oh,” Taako sounds confused at first and then it hits him. Magnus’ face falls a little, his eyes gloss over bt he steadies himself before he can cry.

“She passed away due to a sickness four years ago,” Magnus shifts in his seat. 

“Oh. I’m sorry for your loss, even if I am four years late,” Taako says. He’s clearly uncomfortable with the current situation., but is using humor to cover it up. It works too, rising a chuckle out of Magnus. Taako smiles, only a little.

“Thanks. How have you been?” Magnus asks.

“I’ve been good,” Taako says. 

“That’s good,” Magnus says. The conversation is awkward and uncomfortable, it was tight and a little suffocating at best. They both know it could be a lot worse though. Neither of them try to make conversation while Taako finishes his sandwich. The silence is both comfortable and uncomfortable. 

“Have you talked to Barry?” Magnus asks. He watches Taako’s face fall its color drained.

“I. No. I haven’t heard from him since I left. He went off the grid,” Taako stands up to put his plate in the sink, but he lingers there just for a moment. 

“There’s gotta be some way we can find him,” Magnus says sitting up straighter now. Taako tenses, the pleasant mood of their silence leaving the air for tension. Magnus suddenly wishes he hadn’t said anything about this. 

“I mean, I understand if you don’t want to talk to him, but I mean. Did you really give up trying to find him?” Magnus’ voice comes out quick and certain words come out as one. 

“That’s not the reason,” Taako’s voice comes out a lot harsher than expected. “I’ve tried Magnus. Rest assure, I’ve tried.”

“Then why did you give up? Maybe you weren’t looking hard enough,” Magnus points out. Taako turns sharply toward him a fierce look in his eyes.

“Magnus, he’s gone. We can’t find him. He’ll come around when he wants to be found,’ Taako snaps. Magnus stands up abruptly, his chair scraping against the floor, nearly falling over. This makes Taako flinch and suddenly he’s cowering against the countertop.

“Taako?” Magnus asks gently. Taako takes a shaky breath in, he doesn’t realize how shaky Taako’s hands are until now. 

“I think you should leave,” Taako states. He sounds more vulnerable than he should.

“Ta-” Magnus begins.

“Magnus. Please,” Taako is truly begging Magnus to leave.

So he does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> find me on tumblr @http-voltroncoalition


	4. not a chapter but please read

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> zoo wee mama please read this

Hey! So, I wanted to post this up on here before I orphaned/deleted this work. I was wondering if anyone wanted it??? If you do, talk to me in the comments or message me on tumblr (@funkyhypnotic). Thank you!

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr @http-voltroncoalition


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